Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

RANDOM....joker of the year

Now…
Out of sheer randomness, Antu would like to talk about


JOKES & JOKERS

Antu remember the time when she lepak makan with her friends; the three jokers, and our table becomes the most ‘vocal-laugh’ table (period….)
-_-"

“Yo' Mama is so fat, when she went skydiving, she caused an eclipse”

-_-"


So, Antu browse through the internet, and got some pretty funny jokes. Thus, antu would like to share her 'homework', with you guys:

Blonde and Brunette, Falling
A blonde and a brunette both jump off a cliff at the same time. Which one will hit the bottom first?
The brunette, because the blonde has to ask for directions.

Yo' Mama Is So
Yo' Mama is so old, when I told her to act her age, she died.

Yo' Mama Is So
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she put a ruler next to her bed to see how long she sleeps.

Money Vows
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:

"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out."

He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.

On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"

The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal."

The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."

Spaghetti
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for a few years.

One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to have the child. If she stayed in Italy,
he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.

She agreed, but wondered how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support.

One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.

"Honey," she said, "you received a very strange post card today."

"Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later," he said.

The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."

-___-"
A joke is a short story or ironic depiction of a situation communicated with the intent of being humorous. -wikipedia on jokes


but after looking at this pictures,
Antu truly thinks this guy's is the king of all jokers


HAHAHAHAHA.......





What do you think? Write your views and comments about the column. I would like to hear your opinions. Anything & everyone is welcome.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

RANDOM.....mind your english

Now…
Out of sheer randomness, Antu would like to talk about


‘MAT SALLEH’ LANGUAGE

Antu got scolded by her boss today, due to an email she sent using the word ‘conformation’, when its suppose to be spelled as ‘confirmation’

-_-" Grammar and spelling needs to be polish again. Thus, Antu, with determination, WILL READ MORE TO ENHANCE HER ENGLIGH, HAHAHA <---sinister laugh, and national anthem playing at the back
-_-"

Antu is the sort of person who likes to alter ‘Mat Saleh’ language, into a common word. Example:

Confirm – KOMPOM
Driver – DREBAR
Biscuit – BISKUT
Boyfriend – BOI-PREN
Reverse – GOS-TAN (well maybe not, this one)

And so on….

Therefore, as professional working person that I ought to be, I really need to start picking-up my ‘Mat Saleh’ language skills (like serious)
Browsing through the net, looking for stuff to read, I just had to make turns, from my ‘serious want to learn English browsing, to the ‘play-play wrong English’ side (Plus stupid random pictures)

And here are the results:



















HAHAHAHAHA......


What do you think? Write your views and comments about the column. I would like to hear your opinions. Anything & everyone is welcome.